Debutiful

As a ‘late-diagnosed’ autistic, receiving clinical confirmation of my neurotype offered more catharsis and meaningful support than I’d anticipated. It was still a complex road, however, to learn to live and create in full embrace of my wiring. I found myself pushing up against pervasive, pejorative stereotypes of autism, oft-repeated narratives that bore little resemblance to my internal experience, or framed those experiences through a distorted lens. While I knew I didn’t want to be reduced to those stereotypes, neither did I want to rebuild my sense of self in opposition to them. That pressure, to me, was at the root of respectability politics: this desire to stay safe by depicting yourself as the palatable exception to a denigrated rule. I wanted the freedom, and the courage, to experience the full extent of my being, and, when I chose, to allow others to experience it as well. 

Just as two-dimensional, pathologizing narratives of neurodivergence had fed my internalized ableism, nuanced and compassionate narratives of neurodivergence deepened my capacity to embrace the complexity in myself and others, in life and in writing. These narratives offered multi-faceted depictions of people who–whether by inherent wiring or acquired coping–operated differently than what was societally-centered as ‘normal.’ Encouraged by the example of such stories, I wrote my first novel, Somewhere Soft to Land, with a neurodivergent protagonist who has many dimensions. I felt emboldened to allow Dzifa to be sharp, and messy, and tender, and misguided–to release her from the expectation to be likable or relatable and to let her be fully herself. Though there have been plenty over the years, I’m glad I can share at least four of the stories whose nuanced depictions of neurodivergence have moved and fortified me. I will describe as little of the plot of each book as I can manage, as each one is worth experiencing with as few preconceptions as possible. Still, a heads up that I may offer some indications of character arcs.